Opinion: "The Fifth Column" -- the first of a new series......

OCCASIONALLY RATHER THAN MONTHLY

"I'd like you to do a monthly column for me." he said.

"I'm not too sure about monthly," I replied "I can't write to order; I have to wait until the muse strikes me. A drop of brain lubricant at the RSA often helps." Hint, hint. "I could probably do 'occasionally'."

"That's OK," he said. Shows you how desperate he was. So here I am, occasionally rather than monthly.

I listened to all kinds of tips from him. Well, you have to suck up to the Editor, don't you?

He reckons you should write for a slightly lesser intelligence than your own. I'm not sure I agree, though. Look what writing down did to the majestic phraseology of the King James Bible. We ended up with the Good News Bible which is, apparently written for a reading age of twelve.
And doesn't it show? Even I, a Christian Atheist, enjoy the King James but I can't waste my time with the Good News.

So, I'm going to write for my intelligence level and if a few of you have trouble, use a dictionary. English has, arguably, the largest vocabulary of any language, living or dead and we houldn't neglect our heritage.

I told him I used to write technical reports.

He said, "It shows; you make sure you get your point across."

Is that a compliment? Something I did take as a compliment was, some time ago, when my technical reports were peer edited and the boss said that my style made editing very difficult. And a good thing, too!

I mourn the imminent demise of the English language as I know it. I can't stand Americanisms. Or as I put it, "Bloody Americanisms." Note, also, that I use double quotes first. That's how it used to be and as far as I'm concerned, still is. I'm not too lazy to hold down the shift key. And I can't stand the increasing replacement of "who" and "which" with "that" which is an ugly word at the best of times. Mind you, although I try to avoid "that", I do find Americanisms slipping in to my writing.

The price of good English is eternal vigilance. So please be vigilant and let me know if an occasional Americanism slips in. So, take me or leave me.

Occasionally.

--- John Northcott

 NB:  These matters may be on the thoughts of others .  Do share your thoughts with us – with or without publish your name (but your identity must known to Editor).

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