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Have a laugh with us

we need to laugh pretty often to keep good health - and some of the jokes are printable* - so please share yours sending to editor@VillagePress.co.nz  .
* Our readers are of mixed ages and philosophies - what amuses some can disgust others. We reserve the right to be selective in what we publish...

Bears -- sent in by Colin R

  A bear walks into a bar in Billings, Montana and sits down.
 
   He bangs on the bar with his paw and demands a beer.
      The bartender approaches and says, 
      "We don't serve beer to bears in bars in Billings".
 
 The bear, becoming angry, demands that he be served a beer.
     The bartender tells him again, more forcefully,
     "We don't serve beer to belligerent bears in bars in Billings".
  
   The bear, very angry now, says,
     "If you don't serve me a beer,
     I'm going to eat that lady sitting at the end of the bar".
   
   The bartender says,
    "Sorry, we don't serve beer to belligerent, bully bears in bars in Billings."
   
   The bear goes to the end of the bar, and as promised,,,,,,,eats the
                  woman.
     He comes back to his seat and again demands a beer.
   
   The bartender states,
     "Sorry, we don't serve beer to belligerent, bully bears in bars in
                 Billings  who are on drugs."
  
   The bear says, "I'm NOT on drugs."
     (........You're going to love this.............)
   
   The bartender says, "You are now. That was a barbitchyouate. "

    back to shared jokes